The Tooth Fairy Is A Big Dope

First, I’ll have you know that I have met the tooth fairy. Tooth Fairy is a friend of mine. He is brutally handsome, about 6’2″ (yes dear…), with blonde hair, hazel eyes, and currently sporting an awesome beard.

He makes appearances in secret when my children loose teeth. And when he remembers. He’s also clever and very witty. Get a few gins into him and he’s the life of any party.

Tonight my daughter reminded me of her most recently departed tooth.

“Daddy, could you please get my tooth from the shelf in your bedroom so we can put it under my pillow?” she asked, most sweetly.

“Sure, sweetheart! Let’s just go ahead and wrap this bad boy in some tissue…”

“Why, Daddy?” she asked, looking most puzzled.

“Because that’s going to make it easiest for me to find it under your pillow, silly girl.”

Fortunately I was able to quickly rejoin: “I mean, for Tooth Fairy to find it.”

Her brow unfurrowed. Crisis averted.

I’m an idiot. But I love my baby.

Sheepish Tooth Fairy caught absconding with a tooth.

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