Our first item of business in the new house? Cleaning the hell out of it. Actually, our first item was an exorcism. However, since the parish priest was busy with actual work, Wilma, my faithful mother-in-law, stopped by with a small plastic bottle of holy water. I did not know, of course, that she had this bottle in her hand. “Look Wilma, this guy left a Hugh Hefner-style smoking jacket,” I said while holding a floor length red satin robe in my hand. “Isn’t it bizarre? I mean who would” – thwap! “What the hell?!”, I said, soaking wet. “Sorry, hon, instinct. Better safe than sorry. You never know where that might have been.”
This morning a cleaning crew recommended by a friend showed up. They did a phenomenal job. Unfortunately, the scheduled three hours turned into about ten hours of work. But when they left, that place was as clean as a whistle. Oh, and the kids got a treat this morning as the massive playset we found for them on craigslist was delivered. Hours of fun for the whole family (or those of us taking opioid painkillers).